< Back to Community News

PINE NUTS – Sleepin’ on a Futon

July 27, 2023 | McAvoy Lane

I’m practicing sleeping on a futon in anticipation of my high school sweetheart visiting with two of her lady friends. Well, I slept in the ground for a year in Vietnam while in the Marine Corps, so my futon is like a DreamCloud Mattress by comparison. I actually had a dream last night that I was Tom Sawyer, meeting up with Becky Thatcher, and Becky was saying…

  “Oh, I know you. I remember you from church. You’re Thomas Sawyer.”
     “They only call me that when I’m bad, you can call me Tom.”
     Tom wrote some words on his slate, and hid them from Becky. She begged to see 
them. Tom whispered: “Promise you won’t tell.”
     “I promise,” said Becky. Tom moved his hand, and Becky read the words: “‘I love you.’ Oh, 
you’re bad!” She blushed and turned away, but Tom saw her smiling, and he knew she was 
     At lunch Tom and Becky met behind the schoolhouse, and Tom asked Becky a question. 
“Have you ever been engaged?”
     “No,” replied Becky.
     “Would you like to be?” asked Tom.
     “Maybe. What’s special about it?”
     “Well,” said Tom, “first we kiss, and then you like only me, and I like only you. And we 
walk to and from school together.”
     Becky thought it sounded nice, so she said, “I love you,” in Tom’s ear. 

Then I woke up…

So, the girls will have the upstairs to themselves, while I can help myself to a midnight snack downstairs without waking anybody. Nervous? As Huckleberry might like to say, “I reckon not!” The fact that we have not seen each other in thirty years will not prevent us from remembering that we used to be as close as a couple coffee filters. And we can always reintroduce ourselves…

I might want to say, “Hi, I’m Tom Sawyer, Black Avenger of the Spanish Main, and you?

She might like to answer…

“Pleased to meet you, my name’s Tina, Tina Bo Bina, banana fana fo fina, fee fie mo mina, Tina!” 

The gentle reader is much too young to remember, “The Name Game,” and I caution you, do not try it, for it will ransack your brain before you know what you’re about.

We’ll have Happy Hour with some friends, and take in some music on the beach before dining out. A short hike is on the agenda, along with a swim in the Lake of the Sky. I just hope I can find my mask, my snorkel, my fins and my noodle, for without my noodle, I could find myself on the bottom of the lake alongside some gangsters I don’t even know.

Well, please hope me luck in this encounter of the ages. All I can say in advance is that I know I will see her as the wonderful creature she has always been, composed entirely of watch springs and happiness, while I, meanwhile, shall try my level best to not be an ass…

Audio: https://anchor.fm/mcavoy-layne

Related Blog Posts

Sign up for our weekly SnapShot newsletter